She was conscious of the inappropriateness of her summer dress, with its bare shoulders and too-high hem. It was too warm to wear panties. The church ladies had stared at her.But it was so hot in the sanctuary; a line of perspiration gathered at the base of her neck, under her short red hair, and ran, tickling, down her spine.She hadn't taken her eyes off the priest throughout the mass, in case intense concentration would speed the delivery of God from his words into her soul. He preached to her, in English and the heady tones of Latin, pouring the word of God over her like warm, thick oil.She knelt in prayer, and among the bent heads and closed eyes she watched him, a vessel of the Creator, and let him pray to her. For her.She knelt still as the congregation filed out, content in their relationships with Christ. The old wood bit into her knees, but she kept still, watching the now-abandoned altar, until silence as heavy and insidious as the heat crept over the sanctuary.She rose.. The morning of my trip found me sitting in the foyer looking out thefront window. I was wearing a burgundy skirt suit and a white see-through blouse with a standup collar revealing an utterly feminine whitelace slip. I had wiggled into cream-colored control top pantyhose andbeige leather pumps. Tracy had made me wear an underwire bra that urgedmy very own breasts into prominence. Gold hoop earrings, an antique locket, a tennis bracelet and severalrings completed my ensemble. I toyed idly with my necklace until it wastime to leave. Aunt Helen and Tracy drove me to the airport and stayed with me until Iboarded the plane with my overnight bag and burgundy purse. As I minced to my aisle seat, a wave of humiliation came over me. I hadlet two females take away my trousers and masculinity and now, withoutanyone guarding me, I was trying to pass myself off as a girl! I hadallowed myself to be petticoated and then cooperated in learning tobecome more and more ladylike. My skirts slid up.
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